how does oppression hurt the oppressors?

the idea of oppression hurting the oppressors as well as the oppressed isn’t new. and in anti-oppression circles, it’s an idea that is popular.

yet, the next step of identifying how oppression hurts oppressors is rarely taken. and if it is, the examples usually pale in comparison to the damage done to the oppressed. for example, sexism hurts men because it keeps them from understanding their feelings… but it kills women.

and still, it feels necessary that the only path forward is to have the oppressors understand their own damage. and then enlist them in tearing down their own systems of oppression (via the leadership of the oppressed).

today, i finished the intersection podcast episode about football. in it, i heard a powerful example of how masculinity hurts men. young boys are often forced to play football. many of them go on to then experience head trauma (concussions). they are then often penalized (by having to sit out) when they are honest about their concussions. so they don’t. in the end, they could even end up with CTE. in essence, they are causing physical damage to themselves in order to perform masculinity as societally understood.

:O

designing systems with feedback

i think what i do well is design systems with feedback. i feel pretty good at creating an initial solution to a problem that includes room for feedback so it can improve over time. 

now all that said, this process isn’t new by any means. defining just enough structure so an idea can get off the ground and then improve over time is the core of design-thinking, lean product development and probably more. all which i’ve been significantly influenced by.

so what i bring (i think) is personal level implementation. i’ve created a system for managing my own calendar that has evolved over the past year into a comprehensive time management protocol. it is by no means perfect but it keeps me feeling sane, making progress, and has clear indicators built in to trigger re-evaluation when necessary.

i’m sharing the lessons i’ve learned with one of the guys i mentor and he’s said it’s been illuminating. in 2016, i’m learning a lot about where my tools and systems come from and how they might apply or not to someone else. more learning to come soon.

breakthrough

last night, a friend i’m working on a project with said to me you’re the “#1 most organized person i know.”

i’m coming to realize that have a keen awareness of how to organize systems. i think i’ve already written about this once this year.

as i walked to the train this morning, i had a revelation that doing organizing work is how i should economically support myself. it comes to me SO naturally. even in the past few weeks, i’ve given away several pieces of advice that have been helpful to friends. of course, i will continue to do that and i think i’ll start planning how to earn income with those same skills.

after some calendar coaching, one of the guys i mentor said “can’t wait to talk– really trying to stick to calendar. it is amazing to track what i actually do every day. thank you, lawrence.”

erin g-h said “#1 most organized person i know”

cyndi asked “how do you keep up with all these tools and always have exactly the right tool for the right purpose?”

jonathan asked for advice in the future on personal budgeting systems.

maybe i should start a consulting firm.

who belongs?

today, i’m wondering about how to expand our (america’s) understanding of who belongs.

i’m getting ready to write a blog post for mlk jr day and the focus will be his letter from a birmingham jail. this letter means a lot to me because of .

“I cannot sit idly by in Atlanta and not be concerned about what happens in Birmingham. Injustice anywhere is a threat to justice everywhere. We are caught in an inescapable network of mutuality, tied in a single garment of destiny. Whatever affects one directly, affects all indirectly. Never again can we afford to live with the narrow, provincial "outside agitator” idea. Anyone who lives inside the United States can never be considered an outsider anywhere within its bounds.“ - Letter from a Birmingham Jail, 16 april 1963

the connection between this analogy and john a. powell’s ideas about belonging seems particularly critical to me right now. as i think about donald trump’s bid for the presidency, i wonder how to encourage people against (and for) him to see each other. he is incredible at finding a single or group of people to victimize. how can belonging counter that? how can our shared identities help bind us even as we are different?

systems

today a friend requested some help budgeting. he has seen my detailed attention to my evolving budgeting systems over the years. from manual spreadsheets in excel to mint and now simple.

i am proud of the way i find ways to analyze a system, identify what’s needed, and then find a long-term solution. and i’ve found that the best solutions require a small amount of regular (up to daily) maintenance to achieve the goal.

this approach to systems reminds me of some off-hand my friend, nadeem, gave to a student at party. the student asked nadeem how to make a meaningful change. nadeem’s response: do something for five minutes a day for a long time. the kid responded: wait, but shouldn’t i do it for a few hours a week? nadeem: no no no, that’s way too much. if you can do five minutes a day, see how you like it. if it works, you’ll keep it up and do more. small, sustained acts over time is how we actually effect change.

i concur.

see poem: http://www.grahameb.com/pinkola_estes.htm