two defining factors – death and faith

as i get older, i have noticed that two significant “events” in my life have had a drastic impact on my way of being. the first is that i (clinically) died once. the second is my evolving relationship with christianity.

on death and dying

when i was 16, i was in a terrible car accident that resulted in me flatlining for 3-4 seconds on an operating table. i woke up feeling great (painkillers), but confused. over the few months of my recovery, i learned how lucky i was to have survived. coming to grips with fact that easily could have not been lucky has completely changed how i think about life. i would even go so far as to say that i’ve experienced an epigenetic change. i was already a pretty driven kid, but after that, my approach to life took on a whole new rigor. this is consistent with many other people who have near death experiences.

speaking of faith

i grew up in a christian household, mostly hated it when i was very young, fell in love with the faith and the Church when i was a little older, became disillusioned in my early adult years, and became distantly enchanted as a mid-twenties adult.

i have always believed strongly in the core values of christianity (love, mostly), but have consistently struggled with the hypocrisy evinced by mainstream american christians. this impacts how i live because i’m able to hold the core values while eschewing the institutions.

turns out, this ability is surprising (and incredibly attractive) to people. it gives me a lot of joy to love and it seems people around me appreciate it and respond well to being loved.

these two factors, having personally experienced death and holding onto christian values outside of the institution, i think make my worldview and approach pretty abnormal. i’m a fan, though.

asters and goldenrods: my design philosophy

just finished the episode of onbeing with robin wall kimmerer. one story in the episode resonated strongly with me.

when robin was a freshman, the way asters and goldenrods grew together fascinated her. when she asked her science teachers why they did this, they told her that this was not a question for science. they said if she wanted to answer this, she should study art.

as she proceeded as a scientist, she eventually DID find a biophysical reason for their cohabitation. the combination of the purple and gold together attract more pollinators than either plant would on its own. so the plants have evolved to support each other’s growth. kimmerer calls this “a matter of aesthetics and a matter of ecology.”

in many ways, this explains my design philosophy. good design (particularly good graphic design), is about finding solutions so elegant that they attract more than that same content would have otherwise. good design improves the functionality of everything involved.

i’m not there yet, but i strive towards this ideal in every design project i take on.

the danger of tabs as todo lists

i’ve noticed among my friends and colleagues (myself included) the growth of tabs as to do lists. i use tabs to hold articles to read, videos to watch, sometimes even Facebook statuses i’ve drafted but don’t want to publish just yet…

using tabs as a task management tool in some ways can be cool. it removes the need for another system. the “reminders” (open tabs) are usually in your face, so the likelihood of remembering to do the thing is high. there are probably other reasons it can be a good thing.

but there are two specific reasons i think it’s bad.

first, it’s typically bad for you computer. especially if you use a modern browser (like chrome) that’s a LOT of processing power you’re requiring of your computer. if you’re running 30 tabs your computer performance is going to suffer.

second, and more importantly, it’s work avoidance. it lets us to hide from the reality that we actually have to make decisions about our time and what we consume.

on one level, this is bad because the world we live in has shifted from limited to limitless content. every two days we create as much content as the entire world did up until 2003. IMO, this means we HAVE to be get better at live-action discernment or we’ll drown. or worse, some of us will drown while others learn to swim (there are signs of this already).

on another (related) level, this work avoidance is problematic because when we don’t discern, we miss out on important things. the democratization of means of production means that (for better or for worse) we’re going to have more content. i think, on net, this is positive, because people who should be able to make but were previously shut out because of limited access won’t be anymore. but, still, what if you miss the article about how your field of work is changing because you’re busy watching cat videos?

of course, none of this should be terribly alarming. people are actually pretty good about making these types of decisions on the fly. this is evidenced by the fact that most people do nothing with the vast number of tabs they leave open. we know when to stop and read/watch, when to skim, and when to just let it go. even if we’re not explicit about it.

that said, if we, collectively, don’t get more skilled (and explicit) about all of this, some people are definitely going to get left behind.

ps - thanks, @whobrien for the conversation that triggered me to finally write this post.

style and pace of life: boston vs gainesville

over the past few months I’ve had at least three friends talk to me about being unhappy in boston. these are high-functioning, awesome individuals so i don’t think their unhappiness has anything to do with anything they’re doing wrong.

i think i’m coming to recognize that that the style and pace of life in boston (maybe as it is in all cities) simply doesn’t align with how some people thrive.

when i think back to my gainesville days, i remember the pace of life as back, spontaneous, and communities were tightly-knit. it didn’t take much effort at all to get 4-8 people together on any given weekend.

boston life, on the other hand, is fast-paced, high energy, and it takes a concerted effort to form community. whether it’s going to some event or speaker series or talk… there’s always something going on and people are always busy. hanging out with people 1on1 takes 1-2 weeks notice.  even seeing close friends can be tricky because there are so many different places to expend ones energy.

i’m beginning to wonder if some of my friends aren’t thriving in boston because they just need a different pace. there’s also something about how the pace impacts the gravity of community… i think that’s another post, though.

adult learning and personal schedule design

one of the guys i mentor has been trying out some bits of my systems (which i talk about here [link to forthcoming post about pieces of my methodology]). sometimes, it seems like some things stick and other times, he’s feeling like it’s not working.

he’s got the writing on the wall (literally) but sometimes the stuff just doesn’t stick. 

on one hand, i’ve done lots of reading and i’ve integrated that into my life in a way that works for me. it will (probably) be different for him and everyone else, too. 

on the other hand, i think the learning that i’ve done about how to apply this thinking is non-trivial. and i want to underscore the word learn, because it is just that: learning. and, this, unlike many things people our age have learned up until now, requires a different type of learning. 

i’ve heard this referred to as ‘adult learning’ and, though i haven’t done much exploration of it, it seems pretty critical to thinking about how i (and other people) will learn this personal scheduling stuff.

hm!

found a quick primer here. seems legit.